Your Life Matters and so does your funeral.
Funerals make a social statement that says, “Come support me.“ Whether they realise it or not, those who choose not to have a funeral are saying, “Don’t come support me.“
– Dr Alan Wolfelt.
Grief is the price we pay for love, and people need time to mourn the loss of a loved one. Sometimes, we feel that by denying a loss or shielding our families we can ease the hurt or stop the feeling of grief. Grief is hard, unbearable at times, but certainly doesn’t go away if we try to deny it happens.
All our significant life events are shared with others. Birthdays and weddings provide an opportunity to come together and share. A funeral should be the same, allowing those who knew us to show that our life mattered to them, to remember and to celebrate a life lived.
Funerals offer finality and understanding that loved ones have died and beginning a journey of our life without them in it.
A funeral is not a fuss; it’s saying goodbye with dignity and purpose, a symbolism of our love and a meaningful life event.
Every story deserves to be told. It’s what makes us unique. Have the conversation now because it cannot be had once you’re gone.
‘Your Goodbye’ is about your farewell to family and friends. It’s about the final pages of Your Story, but like any good book it takes input and help from others. Your Goodbye should be a collaboration between you and those you love most, so that when the ink dries on your last page; you can all close the book with a sense of ease, understanding, pride and unwavering love.
It might feel unusual to talk about death and as humans we often shy away from it, but the relief it gives our loved ones cannot be ignored. We’ve compiled some answers to commonly asked questions about funerals, honouring memories and dealing with grief.
What if I don’t have many family and friends left and there’s hardly anyone to come to my funeral – do you still have one?
Whether there is one person or one hundred who might attend, it’s still important to acknowledge your life. Funerals are not about how many who attend but what it means to say goodbye for those who attend.
I don’t want my family to grieve when I’m gone, I want them to think of me and have a celebration. Won’t a funeral make it harder for them?
It’s a caring gesture to not want your family to be hurting but research shows very clearly that we cannot prevent grief from occurring just because we don’t want to be upset. Grief, is normal, natural and to be expected – a funeral actually helps people to express their feelings so they don’t bottle them up and become unwell later.
What if my family doesn’t like the idea of the funeral wishes I have made?
It’s important to talk to them now and explain why you have made your specific decisions – there should be no surprises for your family when the time comes to carry out your wishes.